How to find peace in a world that wants you angry

 How to say this gently? 

We are being played. Yes, that's my observation today from My Porch. The shades are back up after a warm day and the rose and golden sunset filters through the oaks and sycamore and pine trees down the hill. My iced tea needs more ice but I've got to get this on something before I lose my train of thought. You know, at 72, that train has started to run in circles. 

This is one thing I do know with great certainty: my peace of mind is essential to my health and well-being. So I've found a path out of the madness while staying grounded, present, aware and involved in life.

I stopped following the mainstream media.

I stopped being jerked by the ear this way and that. I don't need to be part of their ratings game, a sort of media football contest, where one group of not-news corporations slant their programs one way and run the ball down the field against programming slanted the other way. Little of it is unbiased news reporting. All of it is a ratings game and we're just the fans in the stands. 

It's not about giving us information that is useable and based in legitimate sources. It's about opinions presented as 'news' meant to fire us up and against each other. To turn us into screaming manic fans of one view/team or the other. The idea is to make us fight for those viewpoints so we can feel like winners. But winners of what?

Well I'm not playing anymore. I won't be a screaming fan or any kind of fan of the mainstream media. I lost any interest when I realized during the pandemic that all the major corporate alleged 'news' services were----wait for it---sponsored by Pfizer or one of the other vaccines manufacturers. Yep. No, not just with advertising. Most people ignore those few seconds when the station mentions 'full disclosure' it is sponsored by and fact-checked by the very companies at the helm of the vaccine rollout. Hmmm....

My mother always said 'follow the money.' She also admonished us to 'vote with your pocket book.'

In this situation the way I do that is by not participating. How to quit social media and be OK

Ah, I can hear your screaming "HOW WILL YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON?"

First of all, I don't need to know everything that is going on around the world. We actually receive too much information for our brains to process as it is and become overwhelmed because we can't fix or change any of it. This can raise cortisol levels or stress levels in our bodies. Not good!

Second, I have the ability to research based on more appropriate sources than mainstream media. I can check in with a couple of online newspapers or wire services for headlines if I feel the need. And then I can follow up with independent information sources. Such as? The library, remember those?? I can use all sorts of search engines depending on the nature of the question.

Do I want to know how my members of Congress are voting? Answer: www.govtrack.us/congress/votes

What's the amount of money being spent on education or housing? Answer: nlihc.org/federal-budget-and-spending

Where are the superfund sites and who caused them? Answer: www.epa.gov/superfund/search-superfund-sites-where-you-live

How do I donate to folks in eastern Kentucky after the flooding? Answer: teamekyfloodrelieffund.ky.gov

Or try one of these. Trustworthy Media

What about politics? Well, what about it? I'm sure you've got your opinion. Is it based in research you've done independent of your favorite political talking head? If not, your mind is closed and nothing I write here will change that. Why is that?

My best guess is fear. Of being wrong, of being misled, of learning that people we admired don't deserve that admiration, that what we thought was true, was simply part of this media football game. 

The mainstream media is feeding us, taunting us, egging us on with their opinions. What begins as a notion or a piece of a tiny fact blossoms into 'truth' somehow--if you're not careful. And then, if you're afraid of losing, if your identity is so tightly bound up with your 'team' the tiniest inkling that you might have an incorrect viewpoint on something feels like a minor death to you. These are the people who refuse to consider other pieces of information. These are the people who can be easily misled by their chosen leader--religious, political, podcaster. These are the people who can become zealots to a 'cause' and even dangerous. Prying open that mind is difficult. 

And if you only listen to one or two sources, you have already closed your mind to anything that may contradict what you desperately 'need' to believe and that is a very dangerous place to be for it means you can be manipulated by those one or two sources. If you have no other information source that can be verified beyond the mainstream media, or shock radio, or a couple of Youtube feeds, well, my friend, you're being played. And that's exactly where they want you. In the cheering section, believing that your team is the best team, the one that needs to win. Must win if you are to feel safe, secure, on top, powerful. In fact, the other 'team' needs to be wiped off the face of the earth. 

What I am suggesting is that we try to declutter our minds, just a little bit. Just to see if our minds are completely closed. It's just an experiment, no one will know the results. Just to see where you fall on the scale of Closed Minds. OK? Grab a cold something and let's try this.

Go into a quiet room, say the bathroom when everyone is away. Stand in front of the mirror and look yourself in the eye. Now, think about an idea, a statement that you believe with all your heart and soul is absolutely positively correct, undeniable, truth. Say it again. Out loud. See how you feel. Pretty good, huh? Puffed up, confident, happy??

Now, say to yourself out loud just the opposite. Write it down if you find it difficult to say it out loud. But do it. Then see what happens in your body. 

We know what will happen. Denial of course, some anger, deflated, resistance, probably throw the pen and paper against the wall. Some of the same things our body and mind do when our favorite football team messes up a sure touchdown and loses the big game. Same triggers, same physical reactions, same angry reaction. 

Try it with different personal beliefs and follow the energy in your body and in your thoughts. 

Then take a deep breath, smile at yourself and say this: "It's ok if I'm wrong about this. It's ok to change my mind about this. I'm ok and I'll be ok. Life will go on."

What you'll lose by repeating this experiment from time to time is the noose of a closed mind around your neck. And some anger. Maybe you'll sleep better, too. Unsubscribing from those Twitter feeds and Youtube videos will actually give you a new sense of power in your life. Try it for a few days and watch how your mood changes. 

You may drink more coffee but that's a fare exchange for the peaceful silence coming from your phone and t.v. or computer. 

Maybe have more time to talk with your family or read some books. However, I suggest fiction during this early phase of withdrawal. Leave the political memoirs and historical tomes for another month.

Or check out my Uplifting Videos page. Because?

We need to become more gentle in the world. Freeing yourself from the grip of the mainstream media and political pundits takes energy and willpower. But I believe in you. I believe in our ability to have different opinions that we can talk about without screaming at each other, hurling insults or labels, or openly defying and denying easily researched facts. Putting our trust in only one or two people or sources is a slippery slope toward cultish-fanaticism. It's not a good look on people who say they want their country back. 

Try this video. It's one of my favorites. 

Oops out of ice again. Please enjoy the sunset.

Yvonne

PS: Leave me your reactions to our 'experiment' if you like.  And enjoy a beautiful evening.