Late August Dispatch from The Porch

 

I am grateful for the purple coneflowers that call to any monarch butterflies winding their way south each August. The numbers are dwindling. Even with the over-large tithonia near the porch screaming red-orange flowers at every insect and hummingbird, still, the monarchs are few and far between.

If you didn't know, these amazing beings may soon be on the Endangered Species list. Can you imagine that? Creatures this brilliant and complex, who have survived for probably thousands of years navigating changing terrains, storms at sea, human invasions to their ancestral lands are about to be placed on life support. At least that's how I look at anyone on the ESL. It means that we have failed to coexist with yet another beautiful being on this planet because we are foolish, intent on taking all that we can and sharing nothing--if it doesn't produce wealth for us or a few. 

In our zeal to grow more and more row crops for animal feed and for foods poisoned with glyphosate to limit plants like milkweed, we bring ourselves and the future of such beauty close to the end. Milkweeds are the only food that monarchs depend on as the location for their eggs and to feed the larvae as they grow and change and move through that amazing metamorphosis. What would a world look like absent butterflies, hummingbirds, bees? That's right. Dead. Unlivable. For all of us. 

It's incomprehensible to me that our leadership, politicians, wealthy humans gobbling up or destroying swathes of land for megafarms and cattle ranches, refuse to look further down the road at the world their children and grandchildren will be forced to live in.

I want my grandchildren to feel the softness of the wind as a butterfly chases by them while they stand in my meadow. Is that too much to ask? 

Wherever you live, you can plant milkweed and flowers. Both will support the monarchs and other insects that pollinate and nurture us. We need them. They need us to work and live WITH them once again. Somewhere we got disconnected from our true purpose on this amazing blue ball spinning in space: to be her guardian and protector and in return she would provide all we needed. But not all we greeded. Let's become guardians of the Earth as we were sent here to be. 

If you wish to be part of a solution, and we all must be part of the solution, I urge you to consider these.

Or create a monarch way station with your yard or school or club. 

 

How to find peace in a world that wants you angry

 How to say this gently? 

We are being played. Yes, that's my observation today from My Porch. The shades are back up after a warm day and the rose and golden sunset filters through the oaks and sycamore and pine trees down the hill. My iced tea needs more ice but I've got to get this on something before I lose my train of thought. You know, at 72, that train has started to run in circles. 

This is one thing I do know with great certainty: my peace of mind is essential to my health and well-being. So I've found a path out of the madness while staying grounded, present, aware and involved in life.

I stopped following the mainstream media.

I stopped being jerked by the ear this way and that. I don't need to be part of their ratings game, a sort of media football contest, where one group of not-news corporations slant their programs one way and run the ball down the field against programming slanted the other way. Little of it is unbiased news reporting. All of it is a ratings game and we're just the fans in the stands. 

It's not about giving us information that is useable and based in legitimate sources. It's about opinions presented as 'news' meant to fire us up and against each other. To turn us into screaming manic fans of one view/team or the other. The idea is to make us fight for those viewpoints so we can feel like winners. But winners of what?

Well I'm not playing anymore. I won't be a screaming fan or any kind of fan of the mainstream media. I lost any interest when I realized during the pandemic that all the major corporate alleged 'news' services were----wait for it---sponsored by Pfizer or one of the other vaccines manufacturers. Yep. No, not just with advertising. Most people ignore those few seconds when the station mentions 'full disclosure' it is sponsored by and fact-checked by the very companies at the helm of the vaccine rollout. Hmmm....

My mother always said 'follow the money.' She also admonished us to 'vote with your pocket book.'

In this situation the way I do that is by not participating. How to quit social media and be OK

Ah, I can hear your screaming "HOW WILL YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON?"

First of all, I don't need to know everything that is going on around the world. We actually receive too much information for our brains to process as it is and become overwhelmed because we can't fix or change any of it. This can raise cortisol levels or stress levels in our bodies. Not good!

Second, I have the ability to research based on more appropriate sources than mainstream media. I can check in with a couple of online newspapers or wire services for headlines if I feel the need. And then I can follow up with independent information sources. Such as? The library, remember those?? I can use all sorts of search engines depending on the nature of the question.

Do I want to know how my members of Congress are voting? Answer: www.govtrack.us/congress/votes

What's the amount of money being spent on education or housing? Answer: nlihc.org/federal-budget-and-spending

Where are the superfund sites and who caused them? Answer: www.epa.gov/superfund/search-superfund-sites-where-you-live

How do I donate to folks in eastern Kentucky after the flooding? Answer: teamekyfloodrelieffund.ky.gov

Or try one of these. Trustworthy Media

What about politics? Well, what about it? I'm sure you've got your opinion. Is it based in research you've done independent of your favorite political talking head? If not, your mind is closed and nothing I write here will change that. Why is that?

My best guess is fear. Of being wrong, of being misled, of learning that people we admired don't deserve that admiration, that what we thought was true, was simply part of this media football game. 

The mainstream media is feeding us, taunting us, egging us on with their opinions. What begins as a notion or a piece of a tiny fact blossoms into 'truth' somehow--if you're not careful. And then, if you're afraid of losing, if your identity is so tightly bound up with your 'team' the tiniest inkling that you might have an incorrect viewpoint on something feels like a minor death to you. These are the people who refuse to consider other pieces of information. These are the people who can be easily misled by their chosen leader--religious, political, podcaster. These are the people who can become zealots to a 'cause' and even dangerous. Prying open that mind is difficult. 

And if you only listen to one or two sources, you have already closed your mind to anything that may contradict what you desperately 'need' to believe and that is a very dangerous place to be for it means you can be manipulated by those one or two sources. If you have no other information source that can be verified beyond the mainstream media, or shock radio, or a couple of Youtube feeds, well, my friend, you're being played. And that's exactly where they want you. In the cheering section, believing that your team is the best team, the one that needs to win. Must win if you are to feel safe, secure, on top, powerful. In fact, the other 'team' needs to be wiped off the face of the earth. 

What I am suggesting is that we try to declutter our minds, just a little bit. Just to see if our minds are completely closed. It's just an experiment, no one will know the results. Just to see where you fall on the scale of Closed Minds. OK? Grab a cold something and let's try this.

Go into a quiet room, say the bathroom when everyone is away. Stand in front of the mirror and look yourself in the eye. Now, think about an idea, a statement that you believe with all your heart and soul is absolutely positively correct, undeniable, truth. Say it again. Out loud. See how you feel. Pretty good, huh? Puffed up, confident, happy??

Now, say to yourself out loud just the opposite. Write it down if you find it difficult to say it out loud. But do it. Then see what happens in your body. 

We know what will happen. Denial of course, some anger, deflated, resistance, probably throw the pen and paper against the wall. Some of the same things our body and mind do when our favorite football team messes up a sure touchdown and loses the big game. Same triggers, same physical reactions, same angry reaction. 

Try it with different personal beliefs and follow the energy in your body and in your thoughts. 

Then take a deep breath, smile at yourself and say this: "It's ok if I'm wrong about this. It's ok to change my mind about this. I'm ok and I'll be ok. Life will go on."

What you'll lose by repeating this experiment from time to time is the noose of a closed mind around your neck. And some anger. Maybe you'll sleep better, too. Unsubscribing from those Twitter feeds and Youtube videos will actually give you a new sense of power in your life. Try it for a few days and watch how your mood changes. 

You may drink more coffee but that's a fare exchange for the peaceful silence coming from your phone and t.v. or computer. 

Maybe have more time to talk with your family or read some books. However, I suggest fiction during this early phase of withdrawal. Leave the political memoirs and historical tomes for another month.

Or check out my Uplifting Videos page. Because?

We need to become more gentle in the world. Freeing yourself from the grip of the mainstream media and political pundits takes energy and willpower. But I believe in you. I believe in our ability to have different opinions that we can talk about without screaming at each other, hurling insults or labels, or openly defying and denying easily researched facts. Putting our trust in only one or two people or sources is a slippery slope toward cultish-fanaticism. It's not a good look on people who say they want their country back. 

Try this video. It's one of my favorites. 

Oops out of ice again. Please enjoy the sunset.

Yvonne

PS: Leave me your reactions to our 'experiment' if you like.  And enjoy a beautiful evening.

 

We have the power to change the world. We've had it all along. Step away from the media, step away from the politics, and join hands with total strangers to create the world we dare to dream into being. Find more inspiration at http://riverasun.com/

1st Dispatch from the Porch

 I considered starting a new blog, 'Dispatches from the Porch" but reawakened this old narrative from six years ago when I went up to Standing Rock from North Carolina where I was living at the time. What I learned as an ally in five short days has remained with me, embedded in my heart, a roadmap for community and the collective power that grows organically from a commitment to the Earth and to the generations ahead of us.

Life as viewed from my 2013 Honda Fit has been so winding, so full and now, so quiet, I found myself at 72 feeling the big deep yawn of depression creeping into me for the first time in many decades. The result of this idle time that I've been gifted after many decades of work, relationships, moving, raising children, raising hell, did I say moving, now culminates on this large screened-in porch at the west side of my small rural home in southern Illinois. I never thought I'd return to the state of my birth, but destiny has a way of wiping that smugness off our faces to give us another look. The blessings are many as I'm just two hours from two of my daughters and their families and closer to my son by a full day.

From my porch looking over the side yard of these nine acres of aging oaks and sugar maples and sycamore and gum trees on a sloping meadow, I find my solid ground. I’m free to think or not think, to breathe, to listen, to hear. I have a most excellent view of the world, one that enthralls me, entertains, educates, validates, arouses hope, fosters love and rips my heart out from time to time. It’s all here and between daylight and dusk the movements of the stars, the sun and moon, I quietly witness the sacred fragility that is life.

 Is it my age? The state of the world? Allergies squeezing my nasal passages shut? What I know is that 'Healing the Heartland' has a new meaning today, one I've considered for months. The title fits with a new energy, a drive to explore where we are hurting as a society, as people seeking purpose and security and my deep yearning to look fearlessly into how we suture the wound, the tear (and tears) and labels that threaten us with sepsis, poisoning us, stomping on our ability to connect, unite, befriend. But I believe there is a cure. It will take a willingness to listen beyond soundbites, hateful mudslinging and single word labels. It demands that we push beyond the media faces and pundits we thought were our allies and seek a higher ground. It will take energy, a commitment to change. And love. Lots of love for ourselves and for this world. I'm not always certain I'm up for it. But as a grandmother, an elder, I must be up for it. I don't really have a choice.

This is where I begin today. With a hope and a prayer. I can't do this alone, no one can. I'm sharing the voices and writing that help me move above the chaos, the anger, the pitchforks to see this place...

So this is my invitation to anyone who stumbles onto my porch where the screen door is never locked: come sit a spell. Let's share coffee or tea, listen to crickets and to each other and search together for what may be helpful to end the madness of separation. 

Welcome! I can't wait to meet you!

Still in love with the world

Just a few days ago, I received the link to an interview between me and staff at KHOI-FM radio in Ames, Iowa, when I was about half-way through my journey to Standing Rock. I thank KHOI for providing this audio which also includes several voices of varying perspectives on the Dakota Access Pipeline, the issues impacting the region, the tribe and the environment.Sprouts Pacifica Network

On Dec. 13th, I was interviewed by Laura Elliott for WPVM.FM 103.7, another community supported radio station in Asheville, North Carolina. I offer them here as bookends of sorts for my pilgrimage along the pipeline. Please feel free to leave comments or questions below.

"Although the warrior's life is dedicated to helping others, he realizes that he will never be able to completely share his experience with others...Yet he is more and more in love with the world. That combination of love affair and loneliness is what enables the warrior to constantly reach out to help others. By renouncing his private world, the warrior discovers a greater universe and a fuller and fuller broken heart. This is not something to feel bad about; it is cause for rejoicing." ~ Trungpa Rinpoche

What am I left with inside and in service to the world now that I'm back in my familiar territory, in my old patterns, among my friends and family? A deep yearning continues to comprehend it all. Some of it feels like a protracted dreamstate.  A jagged wound festers in my spirit that no news story or government promise or funding withdrawal from DAPL seems to ease. The voices and the familiar photos on Facebook and other social media only fill me with a deep longing to be there again even though it is not the right time for a 66 year old non-Native to tackle the harsh North Dakota winter in a teepee. Even one with insulation. 

I lament the lack of photos from my trip. I wish that I had taken even more time than the seven days of slow travel and gotten closer to some of the people behind the military equipment if only to convince myself these are also humans like me. I wanted to make sure they weren't robots. Those photos I took speak volumes of the degradation of the earth, the lack of respect for the wildlife, the waterfowl, the insects, the very earth that binds it all together. I still cannot look at some of them without crying.

But where do all  these tears come from? 

Shortly after my return from Standing Rock in early December to the home I shared with my beloved companion, it became clear that our relationship was floundering for several reasons. We attempted to hash things out, restructure, pout, fight, make up, to no healthy end. So early in January, 2017, after a few weeks of sorting my possessions, packing boxes, dismantling the many parts of our life together, I shoved all my boxes back into the storage unit and moved in temporarily with a good friend, sharing her house for a couple of months until the next step in my life's path opened up for me.

I am convinced that this time traveling the heartland, opened a deep wound in my spirit that returning to the relationship could not mend. My heart and spirit have become much more entwined with the very earth I stand on, the Earth that lives me. The deep agony of witnessing her brutalization broken open my feeble wishes for the pathological destruction to stop. 

POSTSCRIPT 2018: In re-reading this narrative from two years ago, I realized that the seed that was planted at Standing Rock, had taken root, germinated, blossomed. Hearts and minds have been tapped and changed. Politicians have been elected that represent the world-view embodied at Standing Rock with real Natives now serving in Congress. Native women at that. Standing Rock began in the minds and hearts and calling of Native women. My dream, my hope, my fervent prayer is that these women will now be able to use the power of the Congress to open more hearts and minds and begin the long, long, journey back to loving Mother Earth. 

Standing in at Standing Rock

One of the difficulties of being at Standing Rock is maintaining balance when dealing with all the misinformation, misinterpretation and missteps encountered while making a place in that very organic, organized chaos of a community of prayer and resistance, natives and non-natives, ages, families, working groups. It was impossible for me personally to be unaffected by almost everything I saw and heard. This microcosm of our world and of the native/non-native intersection was a powerful reminder to me, as an anglo, of what we miss or lack in our culture of exclusivity, consumerism, limited vision and disconnection from Mother Earth. I again felt the pang of envy for the songs I heard from native women or men as they sang to their Mother. Where are our songs for the water, the air, for the next generations? I went to the river and made up my own.

Overview of Oceti Sakowin with police presence on the ridgetop.

I had the privilege of spending five days at the camp between November 21st and 26th , observing, volunteering, assisting my hostess with bringing over water and tending the fire. Time slows down at the camp. The day is measured by the rising sun and the call of the drums and voices to get up and join in the prayers. Then the daily chores of camping out, offering assistance where needed and doing a lot of walking...from campsite to water, from campsite to portapotty, to the kitchen for food, to meet up at the community center or to what is commonly called Facebook hill or media hill, where the press corps hang out and everyone who needs to connect with the outside world heads to post their emails or make phone calls. It's a lot of walking. But feet allow you to connect with the Earth and with the others at camp.
And my meetings with folks here were always surprising and enlightening. One way or another. Lots of young people here and I took advantage of sitting around Sacred Fire with some of them to hear their experiences. There are seven Sacred Fires tended constantly; anyone can add wood to the firepit and be warmed by its heat. I was warmed by conversations as well.
Everyone want to know: "What's it like at Standing Rock? Was it safe? What about the police?"
First, I didn't encounter any direct violence but I did observe the aftermath of traumatic stress with several people who were in the event on Sunday and that gave me pause. Second, as a woman, I felt more respected and safe at Standing Rock than I do in many places. Women are greatly respected among Plains people and the Lakota, Dakota, Nakota. It was very sweet to be addressed as "auntie" or "grandmother" and offered help from the youth. Meals are served in this order: women with children, other women, then elder men and youth.

My journey to North Dakota along the pipeline route  has come to a close. At least the driving part is done. Coming to terms both internally, politically, emotionally will not be easy. Leaving the camp and my companion/sistar/warrior woman, Dell Hambleton, on Saturday morning was very hard. I took time to stand by the Cannonball River, pour out the blessed water I brought from the Oconaluftee River within the Qualla Boundary, Eastern Band of the Cherokee Nation. My spiritual support sisters and I hiked to a point where we could collect the running water in September, add our prayers for peace and reconciliation and awakening that I carried with me across the country.

With the now empty bottle, I scooped up some of the Cannonball River and her energy and prayers to take back with me. But when I arrived, first at the Ft. Yates burial site and then at the monument to Sitting Bull down the road, I was called to take the water with me as I looked out over the Missouri River. I imagined how he himself had plied these rivers, drunk from its waters and gazed upon the flowing grasslands that once teamed with buffalo and elk. I knelt facing the River and poured the Cannonball River water into the soil around his monument. I want to believe his spirit enjoyed the drink. Then it was time to face south east and journey home. Here is a video from his great granddaughter. 

I can't explain Standing Rock to you in a few blog posts. I may never be able to completely explain it to myself. Perhaps the following essay can help.

I have more photos and reflections in preparation. This journey isn't over.  It has simply taken a rest. Please stay connected.

Updated: Day 6 now includes the link to the interview at KHOI. Worth a listen, not just for me but several other voices on the issues surrounding the DAPL.

So you want to help.....go to Iowa!

Yes, Iowa, and several other places.

I went to Standing Rock as the culmination of my calling to see the pipeline under construction for myself. What I found was this: miles of unfinished or unstarted pipeline especially in Iowa and western Illinois. While Standing Rock and our indigenous neighbors have created one of the greatest and most historical moments of environmental and indigenous rights resistance, there are places in between Patoka, Illinois and Standing Rock that need our energy. Please know that with so many miles of unfinished pipeline, we COULD conceivably create enough civil disobedience to stall this pipeline and use up more resources from DAPL and local agencies and possibly bring more awareness in more places.

If I was to place a bet today on what could turn the tide it would be Iowa. Here's why: several key issues including the unfair use of eminent domain in obtaining land for this pipeline and the very real threat to agriculture (which I witnessed for hundred of miles in Iowa) and the climate fraud perpetrated by Exxon Mobil which knew about the effects of climate change already in the 1970's yet has forged ahead in spite of their own findings.

I know, I know, non-violent civil disobedience in Iowa does not have the same romantic ring as being at Standing Rock. But if you are truly serious about all of the issues surrounding this pipeline, then just hanging out at Standing Rock is not serving the needs of that tribe or of stopping the pipeline. Standing Rock is not Burning Man. You and your friends may want to make it so, but please understand this is a pivotal moment in freedom of speech, freedom to assemble, tribal sovereignty and to also impact whatever shred of decency, morality and civic duty remains in our elected officials (and it's skimpy and getting more threadbare by the moment.)

PLEASE CONSIDER where and how to put your energies. Thousands of people have flooded into Standing Rock in just the past week. What might we have changed by congregating at the Des Moines River outside Ames, Iowa, or at Sandusky, Iowa, where DAPL plans to drill across the Mississippi? What about the good folks also fighting in Nebraska, Oklahoma and Louisiana?

Dec. 15: Stand in Court With Landowners vs. Dakota Access Eminent Domain

YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!  In just a couple of weeks a very important hearing will take place in Des Moines, Iowa. We can be there and support the many landowners fighting the loss of their land through eminent domain. 

I saw this trailer on my way out of Ames, IA. It's impressive. (Photo courtesy of Bold Iowa.)